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Why do our animal instincts get called on whenever sex comes into play?

We’ve been making excuses for our behaviour for too long. Are we human, or are we animals? Is there really no way to control what we do?

Basic instinct 

It’s become widely accepted that people – and guys in particular – cannot control their actions. It’s a very popular train of thought: our animal instincts are so strong that our reasoning and decision-making faculties are powerless to control them.

Welcome to the jungle: everyone is trying to eat.

This view is hilarious at best and infuriating at worst. So many our actions that we carry out every day are based on a logic that would be unattainable if we were truly wild animals of the savannah. So why do our animal instincts get called on whenever sex comes into play?

Creepy leering 

In theory, your eyes get bored with whatever you are looking at after just four seconds. If you spot a good-looking woman, it should only take a few moments for you to fully appreciate her features. But is this the case? No way. Guys will follow a woman’s every movement until she moves hurriedly out of sight. She could be crossing the road and you’d still see a man, probably in a car with his girlfriend beside him, turn and follow her movement instead of watching the road.

And the excuse when their significant other confronts them? “Guys will always look at pretty women. It’s how we’re made.”

Granted, men are visual beings and will notice a beautiful woman. But to crane your neck to the point of pulling a muscle? That’s both unhealthy and crass – not to mention, your partner may decide to deliver a heavy bag across the back of your head. Ouch.

Sex is all around 

Sex is all around us. We’re bombarded with it every day through music videos, adverts, billboards, magazines – you name it. So it shouldn’t be a surprise that it fills the waking thoughts of every adult. Or does it? Between work, family, money, traffic, bills and all the other things the average guy has to contend with every day, does sex really take up that much thought space?

But yes, sometimes thoughts turn to actions. And what happens? Cover-ups and deflections:

“I was drunk, and my body just took over.”

“I wasn’t going to cheat on you, but I couldn’t help myself.”

“Men always cheat, it’s in their nature.”

The same men who say these things are the same ones who won’t change their football team allegiance no matter how drunk they get. So why are they suddenly powerless when it comes to something as important as fidelity?

The truth is we lack discipline. It takes discipline to not leer at women and objectify them, and to be faithful, or just strict about our sexual activity. But rather than take true responsibility for our failings, we choose the easy way out: we blame a “fault” within ourselves.

We are certainly a generation of animals, but only because logic and responsibility have taken a back seat to impulse.

This article was originally published on our sister site Love Matters

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